Boy or girl?
We’re having another boy! That makes three.
Wow! And have all the pregnancies been different?
Very different, yes! My youngest is five, so it’s been a minute since I’ve either been pregnant or had a baby in the house. Plus, I’m over 35 now versus 28 with the first…so there’s that.
For the most part, I think I’ve blocked out my other two pregnancies; perhaps it’s traumatic memory loss 🙂 Without this ability, I fear it would be the end of the human race if women could remember being pregnant and birth!
With my first, I had no idea what to expect, it was all new, and a little scary. As for my second, he’s only two years younger than my first, so when I had him I was still in baby mode. However, with this one, I’m neither in the baby mindset nor is it the first go around. Therefore, I find myself in a new place altogether and very much enjoying it. I have a fresh perspective on pregnancy, and at the risk of sounding cliche, I feel super blessed to become a mom again.
Also, I was more lonely when I had my boys. I was young, not all of my friends had kids yet, and everyone was still going out. Now everyone has kids, no one goes out, and I have these sober little buddies to hang with that love to eat ice cream too!
Are your boys excited to have a new baby brother?
Overall they’re super excited and adorable about it. They’re also very aware of the baby and my changing body. It’s been incredible to go through this experience with them.
How did you decide to pull the trigger on having a third?
We “planned it” in the sense that we always talked about having a third, but after I had the first two nearly back to back, I needed a minute. Luckily when we finally decided to go for it, it wasn’t hard to get pregnant.
And, how have you felt throughtout?
Mostly super hungover for three months — a little nauseous and a touch tired, but not entirely sick. Once I entered the second trimester, I felt great, and the third has been exhausting as expected. Pretty textbook, I’d say.
What are your eating habits while pregnant?
For the most part, I’ve been eating healthy. With my eldest boy, I ate ice cream in the bathtub every night, but not with this one!. Now I reach for fruit, especially citrus, and watermelon. In general, I’m more relaxed about eating, and I’m less concerned with how much I eat.
Any weird cravings?
My doctor is next to Balthazar, and early on in my pregnancy, I discovered this insanely good Italian sub they make. It’s become my ritual to get one after every appointment! In real life, I would never eat that, but for some reason throughout my pregnancy, it has hit the spot!
What’s your pregnancy style?
So far I’ve been able to “make do” with what’s in my closet. I’m in full-on uniform mode at this point and have about three outfits heavy in rotation. Plus, I never met a jumpsuit I didn’t love. I’ve been living in this flight suit — it’s my go-to piece because it’s easy to get in and out of because, as we all know, pants are impossible. I most certainly need an over the head or step-in situation, plus anything tight is preferred to highlight the bump! Also, as it goes, I’ve been extremely busy at work with tons of events to attend. We had our gala when I was about 6.5 months pregnant, and I wore a non-maternity stretchy sequined dress. Like I said, making do!
Do you have a birth plan?
No, I don’t have one. Look, if you want to make a birth plan, I think that’s great; however, I’m of the mindset to do whatever needs to be done for a healthy delivery— whatever that requires. I trust the doctors at my practice, and both of my past experiences have been pretty straightforward. I hope this one is too. Plus, I love an epidural. I have nothing to prove, happy to get one.
We are, however planning to have the baby at NYU. It’s a great hospital, and they’re big believers in skin-on-skin. I believe the trickiest part is figuring out when to have my husband fly home from LA so that he doesn’t miss the birth!
Will you take maternity leave?
I run a non-profit and have a flexible work situation, thank god. With the past two, I took proper maternity leave as I was not in the same position of running The Art Production Fund as I am now. Plus, I had both of my kids over the summer, which turns out was well-timed. However, with this go-around, I don’t want to take full maternity leave and completely disconnect. That will be more stressful for me. We’ll see how it all goes and how I feel, but I plan to work remotely.
How did you get your start in the art world?
I grew up in the art scene, my father worked with Andy Warhol for years, and I always had a love for art. In high school, I started as an intern at The Art Production Fund, and after I graduated from college, I became full-time. It’s been 15 years now (hard to believe!), and an excellent progression. From intern to Executive Director, I’m hands on with all of our projects, including an ongoing public art program at Rockefeller Center, and Art Sundae, a children’s program we launched about a year ago in partnership with Fort Gansevoort.
What’s a parenting challenge you face on the regular?
Our biggest challenge is that I’m often alone in NY with my two boys (soon three) and my husband comes in and out from LA, where he works as a chef. Juggling the kids alone can be a lot, but fortunately, they’re both in school full-time, which is super helpful. I also have a fantastic nanny, plus my parents and sister live close by. It makes a world of difference to know that I have trusted people to call in a pinch. Overall we make it work, with frequent trips to LA on school breaks. While it’s not conventional, it’s fun for the kids to have an exciting bi-coastal life. And, after all, what’s conventional mean anyway?
And, would you ever consider a west coast move?
It’s a possibility that we would eventually move to LA. I’m such a New Yorker and have never seen myself living anywhere else. I grew up in the West Village, my world is here, however as the kids are getting older, it’s becoming more challenging to split our time. Who knows! It could be an adventure.
Remember that we are all doing our best. We miss class trips, forget to pack lunch, lose our temper, and screw up constantly. The guilt can be crippling if you let it – I’ve found so much comfort in sharing stories about fuck ups with my girlfriends and laughing at the insanity.
There’s comfort in remembering that we’ve all been there. Ultimately, we all just want what’s best for our kids, so best not to judge others or ourselves – no one is perfect.